Seventeen Forever

Ever noticed that in most songs that has ages in its lyrics, the age used tend to be "seventeen"?
Ever wondered why?...

"...young and sweet, only seventeen..." - Dancing Queen, Abba

"Why does it always rain on me? Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?" - Why does it always rain on me, Travis

"Stay seventeen each time you get one year older... "- Seventeen, Simon Webbe

"You won't be seventeen forever..."- Seventeen Forever, Metro Station

"She was seventeen and she was far from in-between..." - All summer long, Kid Rock

why seventeen though? is it because it's the only teenage-age that's of three syllabus? so it goes well with the rest of the lyrics of the song? or is it because Seventeen is the phase where you're not too young nor too old, the age before you could experience new things like drinking and venturing into the night life, when you are still young and sweet, maybe even innocent.

three more days of being seventeen. a part of me's very eager to grow up, while a small speck of me's reluctant. maybe it isn't good to grow up too fast, when you get older, you tend to have more responsibilities, people tend to expect more from you, thinking that we should be more mature as we age.

Seventeen - young tender age, but surprisingly gone through a handful of unpleasant experiences. a joke how people associate "Seventeen" as 'young and sweet' with all that i've experienced for the 17 years of my life, i'm afraid of what's to come when i get older. society out there is cruel, reality is ugly. i've always given my trust to people i love easily. and once i feel a tinge of betrayal, i develop a whole new belief, a whole new different aspect of what is right and what is not. after some understanding, i realise, as much as how it sounds nasty, that we could not trust anyone, at all. not even ourselves. okay, maybe in my case only. well that's just the cold hard fact.

i've learnt a handful during the 17 years and i'm thankful to whoever that appreciated my existence or for some reason happy for my presence. and for those who doesn't appreciate, took for granted, or just think whatever negative thoughts you have, save all the trouble, i kindly join you to hate me. and i don't really care, not anymore. and to your pleasure, to those who seemingly dislike whatever it is i do, i don't need your bloody 'help' thank you very much. and if you do not have sufficient amount of entertainment or satisfaction, thinking to use my misery as any part of your disturbed pleasure, heed my advice and burn in hell.

define friends. it's painful really. to see the true side of people, especially to learn that they are actually not what you thought they were. there's a distinct line between friends and acquaintances and there's another group, which is people you totally don't want/need to be associated with. recently i just saw the true meaning of the word friend.

one of my friends, mentioned that sometimes i'm very difficult to read, my moodswings are oscillating very rapidly. yet it's easy to tell what i'm feeling, easily accessed through the expressions on my face. it's true that i show what i feel. no, i don't bloody think that it's a bad thing, for those who are irritated by that fact. if you don't like it then i'm so sorry to tell you that i ain't the same as you, i'm being honest to what i'm feeling or thinking, unlike the pathetic phoney you are.

i could be labled as an easy candidate of giving up. i tend to shut myself whenever there's a problem. i admit, i'm weak for a human being, at least i'm not fake about it. phonies just happen to be on the top of my hate list


Initially i was looking forward to friday, "Sweet Eighteen". people say it's a big deal, and i wanted to go through the passage of growing up fundamentally, celebrating this day ostentatiously. but then again, maybe it isn't a big a deal... but it is, if it were to be celebrated with people who really love me.

people at this age has already achieved a implausible amount of accomplishment, from being scholars, top students to great atheletes, talented musicans and such. those who doesn't, well at least they do have goals in life. me on the other hand, has no goal whatsoever, sad thing is, i have no idea why i'm here at all. pretty much just a sad excuse for a life.

you know what they say, live your life to the fullest. everyday's a new day blahblahblah. i've never really had "the happiest day of my life", i wonder what it's like. never once in my life i felt a hundred percent happy. never once. perhaps i need to undergo therapy. yeah that should probably suck me out of solitude and flush away my solemness.

a sad, disturbing joke really.